I Oozinate for Justice!

Okay, it used to be that American toy companies were content with marketing insanely dangerous toys like potato guns and giant lawn darts.

Now they have a new toy which will likely have an active resale market in the San Fernando Valley adult film industry. Behold, the Oozinator, by SuperSoaker.

This is sooooo wrong, for so many reasons, not the least being the tagline at the end where the announcer says “Major pumping required…”

I assume the video is safe for work, since it’s airing on children’s television here, but the unclean feeling will persist for hours.

Consumerist has a hilarious excerpt from the User’s Comments for this toy at Amazon, which they took down later.

Is this the result of months of market research where America’s children demanded to be showered in copious amounts of “bio-goo” while a fellow prepubescent vigorously pumps a giant alien phalllus?

See, maybe it isn’t such a good idea to sell 9-year-olds thongs at Abercrombie and Fitch after all. Maybe Tipper Gore was right.

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